Negative self-talk is that voice that says things like “Who are you kidding? You are not good enough,” “You’re so stupid,” “What were you thinking?,” and “Everyone hates you.” Sound familiar? If it does, you shouldn’t feel bad; every single person in the world goes through it.
Successful people learn not to listen to those thoughts. Did you ever stop and think about that? You don’t have to believe your own thoughts. You can just tune them out.
This idea was first introduced to me through a book called The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment by Eckhart Tolle, which is a phenomenal read. If you want to get the true depth of this concept, definitely pick this book up. In a nutshell, what it states is that we don’t have to believe our own thoughts. We have multiple levels within ourselves, which you may have heard described as the id, ego, and superego. Basically, we have a negative voice in all of our heads we must fight to control. The negative voice will tell you that you can’t, when you know you can.
Most people don’t realize this voice is not who we truly are. I know it sounds funky, but it’s true. Trying something scary means stepping out of your comfort zone. Back in the day when we were living in the wilderness with wild beasts, this voice probably served some good, warning us, “Don’t pet that saber tooth tiger, it’s not your friend!”
But today, that voice doesn’t serve us anymore. When that voice speaks up, just acknowledge it and recognize it’s not coming from your true self. T. Harv Eker says it best in Secrets of the Millionaire Mind: just tell that voice, “Thank you for sharing,” cancel it, and push it out of your head like a cloud floating away. Those negative thoughts are not really part of who you are. Soon you’ll realize you can overcome them. The negative thoughts never really go away: successful students and leaders just know how to control them and minimize their impact. Your confidence will grow as you learn to pay less attention to that overly negative voice and focus on the voice inside of you that says you can achieve your goals.
It’s a long process, but a process worth investing in.
Arel Moodie is widely known as America's Top Young Speaker. He has spoken to over 65,000 students in 39 states and 2 countries on the topics of student success, student leadership and student entrepreneurship. He is a leading authority on helping students of this generation succeed in school and in life. He is also the best selling author of the book Your Starting Point For Student Success. To find out more about Arel's book, go to www.startingpointbook.com. To find out more about Arel's speaking please go to www.arelmoodie.com.
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